What’s with the cucumbers?
[updated: July 16 1pm]
[updated: July 18 11am]
[updated July 22 9am]
[updated July 24 9.30am]
[updated July 24 2pm]
[updated July 25 9am]
[updated July 28 7pm]
[updated August 5 9.30am]
There’s an old journalist adage: two’s a coincidence, three’s a trend.
There’s a cucumber on the platform at West Hampstead Thameslink
— Anna McGilvray (@an_ode) July 9, 2013
@whampstead Is this anybody’s cucumber left by my flat? pic.twitter.com/PmRsRvfhOh
— ERegis (@EugeneRegis) July 11, 2013
@WHampstead just found this cucumber in the bush outside our flat no joke – whose is it? pic.twitter.com/PQeONuszx1
— Alice England (@aliciaengland29) July 12, 2013
What’s going on? Are they breeding? Is this a Day of the Triffids sort of thing?
My first guess was that it was linked to the new Mexican restaurant opening where Love Food was, but as you can see in the comments below, they’ve denied this.
Then a fourth cucumber was spotted:
@WHampstead We just saw this one opposite Tesco on West End Lane! Could it be crop circles for vegetarian aliens? pic.twitter.com/LnBSw2QjLs
— J. Sager Weinstein (@jacobsw) July 14, 2013
The mystery continued. Then, on Monday, there was a sniff of a lead:
Bizarre sight of the day – a chap in a suit purposefully dropped a cucumber on the platform at West Hampstead Thameslink this a.m.!?! #odd
— Andy Gu3 (@andygu3) July 15, 2013
I followed up…
@WHampstead it happened just as the train pulled up, he had jet black hair, well tanned and fairly short. Well dressed (office worker?)
— Andy Gu3 (@andygu3) July 15, 2013
Where were all the cucumbers coming from? Sainsbury’s?
Cucumbers everywhere in West Hampstead except where you’d expect them. Like @Sainsburys Local WEL. pic.twitter.com/bKXzDDg6kX
— Emily (@emilyeke) July 15, 2013
On Tuesday morning – it seemed the trend was taking hold – now with added spring onions.
@WHampstead what the hell … Right in the middle of the city on fenchurch street MORE cucumbers!! pic.twitter.com/KTNSNN9uP0
— mike (@mike128) July 16, 2013
After a quiet day on Wednesday with no leads, there was a sighting in Chalk Farm in the evening.
@WHampstead the cucumber mystery has spread to Chalk Farm! pic.twitter.com/OE2651pRgK
— Sam Field (@SG_Field) July 17, 2013
This cucumber, lying in the road, was always at risk and swiftly became just another squished vegetable statistic.
@WHampstead distressing scenes in Chalk Farm…the cucumber mysteries have come to a sticky end for this borough… pic.twitter.com/WF3IXe2F5h
— Sam Field (@SG_Field) July 17, 2013
A commenter below also spotted on on the platform at Burnt Oak station that same day.
The story made the national press finally, with a short piece in the Independent which sadly confused West Hampstead with Hampstead and didn’t mention this page as the top source of all local cucumber news.
On Monday morning (23rd), Mark captured this brilliant copycat cucumber move by Gospel Oak pub The Southampton Arms. The caption gives away that this is not an original cucumber though.
@WHampstead even in Gospel Oak, the cucumber mystery is capturing people’s imagination… #cucumber pic.twitter.com/dokp3Z4Q3j
— Mark J Townsend (@Snowyt79) July 22, 2013
The media, er, frenzy continued on Wednesday with the Telegraph covering the piece in its print edition, and adding a dash of celebrity and a woeful grasp of London geography. The BBC Paper Monitor has addressed the fact that all these journalists (who surely all live in north London?) are confusing different neighbourhoods as they report the story.
Then, as if this wasn’t excitement enough, the BBC London Breakfast show wanted to talk to me about it – luckily I was out of bed in time to get the message and had my 90 seconds of fame. Presenter Paul Ross mused that a marrow in Harrow might be next!
The very next BBC London programme was Vanessa Feltz. She brought in Geoff Martin, editor of the Ham & High, who was able to shed no more light on the mystery, despite being grilled for 10 minutes about it (ff to 2h02’19”).
Geoff claimed 40 cucumbers had been spottted, though I have no idea where this – or the 36 cited in the Telegraph – comes from. Vanessa then read out the entire Telegraph article before saying “Maybe we’ll see if we can get that guy from the blog and see if he can talk to us about it.” That would be me – the producers of these programmes clearly don’t speak to each other.
The story then spread to TV. On The Wright Stuff’s review of the papers, comedian and actor Steve Furst picked out the story, though inexplicably there was some debate as to whether it qualified as news. Clearly some mistake there. Catch it here (ff to 53’02”).
The media exposure has revealed at least one more sighting:
@WHampstead RT: Media “frenzy”: Cucumber story updated. Though no new sightings in #whamp for several days now. Saw one in KTown Today
— Kara (@karaseen) July 24, 2013
@WHampstead If I had heard of this story earlier I would’ve had a photo! It was at the bottom of the kentish town high street. Nr the church
— Kara (@karaseen) July 24, 2013
Thursday morning (25th) and my original suspected culprit, the soon to open Mexican restaurant, spotted a cucumber in a local West Hampstead taxi. Investigations are ongoing.
Fresh cucumber sighting! Sat in #whamp minicab this morning…look down & see this..Travelling cucumber? @WHampstead pic.twitter.com/DcxiDt7yir
— Secret W. Hampstead (@secretwhamp) July 25, 2013
It’s been a quiet weekend (thankfully). The last sighting was on Friday:
@WHampstead A very sorry looking cucumber on @MillLaneNW6 opposite food mkt. Nearly caused me to fall off my bike pic.twitter.com/8NmqQunkJ3
— Joanne Skudowitz (@Jojoskudo) July 26, 2013
It’s now August 5th. I’d really hoped the cucumber phenomenon had waned. TimeOut had picked the story up (though who these bloggers plural are I have no clue) but no more sightings.
Then late last night, Marcia left a comment below and then e-mailed me the photo. The cucumber mystery continues…
Sorry, no Dear Watson… it's not us… we'd have whipped those bad boys into a nice fresh cucumber & chilli salsa or served them with Hendricks Gin 🙂 @secretwhamp
The Great Cucumber Mystery continues…
Is it not for the new veg delivery service?
As the cucumbers are cling-wrapped I'm guessing not!
Ach, there was one lying on the platform at Burnt Oak station on Tuesday about 5:45pm, front carriage Edgware-bound. Thought it was odd but nothing more of it at the time, now I find there's an army of them!
I have reason to beleive @andygu3 has fabricated the entire thing
Just got sent a DM about this comment. Very big of you making slanderous comments anonymously! Happy to meet up for a drink to talk it through as I'm unsure what your "reason to beleive (sic)" is.
Is the cucumber not a fruit rather than a veg?! #pedant
yes it has seeds and it flowers
There is one outside our building (Dennington Park Road), on the porch. Have taken photo – how can I upload it?
Lots of veg have seeds and flowers: peas, all beans, courgettes and squashes, aubergine, peppers..and they're veg, not fruit.